The Unholy Three
Today I saw some people bringing their kids to work. I have no kids but when I was growing up I would sometime go with my parents to their jobs; not as part of any officially sanctioned activity, it was more of a: “The state says we can’t leave you in the car so come inside but be quiet” kind of thing.
On trips to my mother’s place of work I learned valuable lessons like:How to sweep the floor at a hair salon and getting lunch from the deli. it was fun until my mother ended that party by getting a education and becoming a nurse. Way to ruin a good time mom.
From that point forward it was up to my dad to take me to work. He worked in road maintenance and construction but also had an office because he was in charge of the crew. Sometimes on the weekends he’d have to go into work and he’d take me along. It was on these trips to the office that he taught me to play darts and when I learned about work porn.
Work porn, as the name suggests is pornography that you keep at work. Yeah, my father had porn in his office. Nothing crazy, mostly Penthouse because that was what work porn was all about.
Perhaps I should explain.
According to my father there were three kinds of pornography:
1-Work Porn was the soft core stuff he kept around the office just so everyone knew he was a red blooded American man who was into regular naked stuff.
2- Home Porn was a little more edgy. Think Swank or Velvet magazine and movies. Hardcore but nothing you couldn’t talk about among grown ups.
3- Road Porn was the final and most dangerous of all the porn types. Road porn was the secret grown up stuff depicting grown ups doing things with each other that we don’t need to discuss in detail. Porn so filthy he you had to keep it in the car and drive to another town just to look at it.
In retrospect my dad was weird or ahead of his time, or weirdly ahead of his time.
